Yesterday was the first time in a while I have had anything unusual happen during my meditation. But, then again, I haven’t been diligent in meditating daily in the morning. I meditated using the chakra sounds. After each I imagine that chakra growing until it expands out to infinity. In the midst of this process, I heard a very loud tapping sound in my bedroom. Initially, I thought it might be coming from the attic roof. When the wind blows very hard outside on the side of the house where my room is I often times will hear cracking sounds. But, this is usually along the wall where my bed is. This sound was coming from the closet area in my room. Also, the sound was different. It was more of a tapping versus creaking sounds. I also thought maybe I had accidentally locked the cat in the closet but then remembered I had seen her at the bottom of the steps prior to coming up to meditate. I close the door to meditate so none of the animals will bother me. I peeked at the door to make sure Willow my cat wasn’t poking her feet under the door. I also felt a heaviness in the air as if something else was in the room with me. I finished the meditation without any further incidents.
I was finally able to sit and meditate successfully again today. My mind has been racing so much it’s been difficult to focus. When I sit down to meditate all I can seem to focus on is my aches and pains as well as all the problems I’m trying to solve. Usually, the pain is in my neck and shoulders, hips, lower back, and the middle of my back. I got to a point today where I didn’t feel any pain. I worked on each chakra repeating the mantras in my mind while deep breathing. I started to feel like I was floating and that nothing was touching me. This seems to be the first sign for me that I’m in the alpha state. I had some difficulty when I got to my heart and throat chakra. It felt like the energy was stuck here and wouldn’t flow properly. This is difficult to explain. It’s really a physical feeling like something is stuck. I also worked on connecting with the earth. I sent energy down into the earth and allowed energy to flow from the earth back into me. I envisioned my energy growing outwards. When I finished, I did some stretching. I kind of feel drawn to do this after sitting and meditating. This just feels right and I follow what my body wants to do. I feel like doing this helps the energy flow better in my body.
The past two days have been uneventful. I had a very difficult time meditating. I think my mind has just been a bit on overload making it difficult to get into a calm state. It keeps racing when I try to redirect it and I have an underlying feeling of constant anxiety. I didn’t bother trying to meditate this morning. I’m also thinking it could be related to my lack of sleep over the last few days. I haven’t slept well and I’ve been working out heavily. I took a break last night. I will re-approach my practice this Saturday morning.
Hiking the Mindfulnes Hike at Valley Forge Park 5/20/23
I woke up and went to use the bathroom. Attempted to prep for astral projection by lying on my back. Used this technique plus bounced between various exiting techniques for at least 45min or so. I wasn’t having any luck in this position. I kept having problems with my legs as usual jumping and jerking as well as my right arm. I rolled over onto my right side.
I tried using the catch yourself going to sleep technique in this position. At some point, I think I must have dosed off for a brief second or two. When I came to again I heard this loud noise in my head. It sounded like a ball rolling around on a roulette table it started off rolling slowly and then it proceeded to get louder and louder. I realized I was approaching the exit phase of AP. I got a little too excited and the sound started to fade. I quickly calmed myself down so I wouldn’t push myself out of the exit phase. As the sound returned I began to wiggle my astral body and half dragged half rolled it out. It was like pulling and stretching taffy. For some reason I always have a great deal of resistance when I am trying to exit.
I finally got all of the way out and everything seemed really dark. It felt as if I was in a drunken stupor. I could only see through my left eye and I couldn’t see anything out of my right eye. I started to get really scared that other entities might be able to take advantage of me in this state. Then I remembered I had put white light and a white cross of light over my body before attempting to exit. I calmed myself down and reminded myself that thoughts are immediate in the astral. Thinking these thoughts would bring it to life.
I remembered also that if your vision is unclear you should ask for clarity. I demanded “clarity now”. This did not work the first time. Again I demanded “clarity now” with lots of intent and my right eye cleared. I was able to see with both eyes at this point. I started walking and pulling away from my body off to the right where my bedroom door is. We keep it closed at night. The closer I got to the door the less resistance I began to feel from my body.
At this point I remembered to look at my hands to sharpen my awareness. I brought my hands up to my face. They both looked normal except they seemed longer and finer. Not sure why that is. Since the door was shut I prepared myself to pass my astral body through the door paying particular attention to what it felt like. I sank my hands through it first. Then the remainder of my body. It felt like something rubbing up against my astral body as I passed through it.
I headed straight for my son Jacob’s room. I’m not sure why, but I feel drawn to my son Jacob when I astral project. His room wasn’t where it should have been. His room is on our left as you walk down the hall. It seemed further down the hall then usual. When I looked in his room, it seemed smaller. Instead of his bed being off to the left it was now off to the right. And the bed and bedding seemed rather large. I wanted to see if he might realize I was there by getting closer to him but I didn’t want to frighten him. I decided to cut it short and return to my body so I would remember my projection.
As soon as I thought this, I was back in my body. I’m don’t remember the process of re-entry. I checked the clock and it was 4:32am.
I sat there and ran through the entire experience over and over again in my head so I wouldn’t forget anything. I realized at this point why I couldn’t see out of my right eye when I had projected initially. My head had been sunken down into my pillow on the right side of my face covering my right eye. I had been perceiving the room from two locations at the time during my exit. From my physical body and my astral body.
4/3/16 5am
I woke up to loud winds outside with. As I was trying to go back to bed “Osvaldo” popped into my head. Also heard someone say “hi” in my right ear. Looked up Osvaldo- means uncertain divine power. Fell asleep and had a lucid dream I was in huge warehouse and was doing the backstroke like I was swimming in water. I lifted into mid air and started to feel astral projection coming on while in the dream state. Strong vibrations were starting. I popped out of my body using the roll technique. Found myself in my bedroom. Told myself I had to focus on a destination. Tried to go out through the bedroom door. I couldn’t see clearly my vision was very dark. I tried to yell clarity now slipped back into my body and dream state.
8/9/16
I’m not sure of the time for this experience at this point because I am recording this late. Was working on AP after waking up in middle of the night. Started working on energy and focusing on humming in my head. Asked for my Spirit Guide to make contact with me and to help me have a positive OOB experience. I asked if this was the way to helping see things differently in my life. I heard a voice say, “Yes this is the way”. It was a female voice. Continued working with energy and attempting to project. Got tired. Moved to bed with intent to attempt upon awakening. At some point in the hypnagogic state I heard the same female voice say “Laura …it’s time to get up now”. Which I knew instinctively meant AP and leave the body. I made an attempt to lift out. I was able to get me head out which felt very weird like lifting it out of water as described by Mike in his “Phase Evolution” YouTube videos. But I couldn’t seem to get the remainder of my body out and I slowly ended up slipping back into my body.
8/10/16 3 am
I woke up from sleep and went to the bathroom. Came back and laid down on my AP mat. Started listening in for the humming that I hear in my head. Worked for about an hour or so moving energy up and down my body and expanding and contracting the energy in and out. Also allowed my eyes to roll upwards gently and focus on the third eye. Called out to my Spirit Guide. Started getting restless. I re-focused on the humming and felt some movement of my energy body. Continued with this and felt energy being pulled and pushed away and towards my body more heavily on right side of my body. Not sure when this happened but I suddenly had a feeling of fullness or expansion in my physical body. I’m not sure hard to describe it in words. I felt like there were two of me. Me within the me. Two mes overlapping if you would. But even these words don’t describe the way it felt. I held this feeling for a while but as I began to analyze this feeling it slowly disappeared. I couldn’t get the feeling back once it went away which was frustrating. I finished my energy work at 5:15am and couldn’t focus anymore at this point so I climbed back in bed.
8/22/16
I woke up in the phase and was hearing and feeling the vibrations; eyes were closed. This happened while at the beach house. At first I thought I had my headphones on and was listening to the “Monroe Institute” CD for AP Condition D. However this was not the case. I was on my left side and for some reason I felt like my left hand was contorted with my thumb bent up backwards against my left check. The position of my left hand was really uncomfortable. I was afraid that I might be cutting off the circulation. I also noted my legs felt funny really heavy dead weight. Decided to trust my hand and legs would be okay. At first I tried to direct the vibrations throughout my body. That didn’t work so well so I decided it was best to relax into the vibrations as I remembered this was important to let them do their thing and engulf me like water. Noted the vibrations were coming from my chest towards the back area in my spine I think. Heart felt like it was beating rather rapidly. I had my eyes closed and the blackness was like window three-dimensional. As I looked into the blackness, a forest began to appear with very young trees that were not more then a few inches wide in diameter. They appeared to be birch trees. They were all spaced about a few feet apart enough to make walking through this forest comfortable. The grass was really tall. I reached out in front of me with my right hand. I started to hear music. I thought it was whistling at first. Maybe it was a flute being played in the distance. I’m not sure what type of instrument it was but it was so beautiful. The vision of the forest started to fade out. Not sure why. Maybe I was trying to evaluate everything too much and it was ruining my composure. Regained my composure and started seeing the forest reappear. Called out for help to exit the physical. Slowly lost the phase state and became fully awake.
8/27/16
Woke up from sleep due to a vibrating sensation at the base of my spine. It really startled me. At first I thought it was a bug that had gotten under the sheets. Laid there a bit longer awake and noticed a pulsating sensation at the base of my head on the right side. Right where my head meets my neck. Was lying on my left side.
9/3/16 3:45am
Woke up at 3:45 and went to bathroom. Got back in bed and attempted to AP. Couldn’t get in the right state as Scott was tossing too much. After three attempts went to the floor mat. First started on my back but I couldn’t relax in that position. Turned on my right side maybe 20 to 30 minutes into it. I think I dosed off at one point then woke up feeling faint vibrations. I tried to roll out and accidentally moved my physical body. I sat still for a bit and relaxed into it. Finally, I was able to throw myself out and I quickly crawled to the bathroom door. I tried to turn around in an attempt to see my body lying there. But, I was afraid I would get sucked back in so instead I crawled out our bedroom door to go see Jessie. Started losing lucidity. Focused on my hands in front of my face. Put them close together and they were glowing a bit. Saw some light between them. Started losing lucidity again and slipped into a dream. Woke up again around 5:30am in the phase with intense vibrations. Relaxed into them this time. Body was in paralysis. Along with the vibrations I saw some white light. Looked down at my lower body and it looked like a heat wave coming up of a hot blacktop in the summer. Really cool. I heard someone yell at me “Now”. And they said something else but I can’t remember. I think it was “now’s the time”. I also heard a grunting sound I thought was the dog but realized she was at the kennel. Then I heard Scott get out of bed which stopped the vibrations. I saw his shadow in the dark come around the end of the bed and he peered down at me on the mat. Then continued to walk out our bedroom door. I heard it open and close. I figured he was having trouble sleeping. I tried to call out to him “where are you going” but the words wouldn’t come out. After he left, I realized it wasn’t Scott that I had just seen because I could hear his c-pap still running. I tried to remain calm and tell myself this was my imagination. I was being tested to see if my fear would get the best of me and prevent me from AP. I calmed myself down and allowed the vibrations to come again. I saw the room become slightly brighter like a purple haziness. Then I started to worry where I would end up after exiting and I again heard that strange grunting sound. Well that was it. I forced myself to move and climbed back in bed too scared to continue. Looked at the clock and it was 5:50am.
These are experiences from a while ago. I tried to date them to the best of my ability.
Meditation Experiences: I don’t have a date for some of these experiences.
7/2016
Sometime while on vacation in Montana. I was meditating in bed when I woke up. I heard the words “Mahat Om”. I looked it up that morning. “Mahat” means voice of the universe.
Conveyor experience I spent about an hour or so chanting to stimulate my chakras. Then remained silent and began focusing on my breath. Eventually, I felt like I was no longer in my body at one point. As if I was floating out in space and there was nothing else. It was complete blackness. Then I was moving forward. It felt similar to walking on one of those conveyor belts at the airport which help you get from one end of the airport to the other more quickly. If you walk along with it you get this intense feeling of forward movement. Unfortunately, I became very excited and as soon as I became excited over the experience it all stopped. One thing I have learned after many years of practicing ….whatever you do DON’T LET YOUR EMOTIONS TAKE OVER!. As soon as you do… it ends. This is similar for AP as well. You need to have complete control of your emotions. It isn’t easy either I can attest to that.
Labyrinth Experience Following an intense meditation period I saw an image of a labyrinth or something similar to catacombs made out of a cobweb type structure. It is so hard to describe. It reminded me of the porous interior of a bone similar to below. However the structure was white not the color of bone as below. And during the experience, my perspective of the structure was as if i was shrunken down microscopically and placed inside this structure below walking through it. That’s the best way i can describe it. I spent a lot of time researching this online after it happened as I was trying to see if anyone else had a similar experience with meditation. But, I didn’t have any luck finding anything.
All Seeing Eye Experience I woke up in bed and wasn’t ready to get up for the day so I closed my eyes again. I saw an image of the all seeing eye. The eye shape was completely jet black and white light was shinning all around the outer edges of it. I immediately opened my eyes again. I couldn’t understand how I was seeing this and questioned that maybe it was an afterimage as a result of something I had looked at in the room. You know how when you look at a light and then close your eyes and see an after image. I couldn’t find a light source in the room that would have caused this image. I opened and closed my eyes two more times and every time I closed my eyes I was looking at the same image clear as day. Once again…i plan to draw this out on paper so that you can get an idea of what the image looked like in my experience.
This is what i saw but it was pure blackness around the glowing part. The yellow that I used demonstrating light emanating around the outside of the eye shape was actually pure white light This is hard to demonstrate in a drawing. I don’t have any black construction paper which probably would have made it easier to draw.
11/12/19 Okay so at bedtime i resumed attempting some of my pre-astral preparation. First focus on each of my chakras. I imagine each color, the wheel spinning clockwise, then it expanding and stretching. I do this with each chakra working my way from the root to the crown. Then i work on expanding and contracting my aura after. I fill the room with my energy and then bring it back into my body. I try to do this during the day as well on and off when i think about it. Last night i didn’t have any unusual experiences other then a pulsating sensation.
11/17/19 8:30am I tried some morning mediation this today. I used to do an hours worth of meditation in the past every morning. I have to use earplugs in my ears to keep out all of the noise. It helps if I have some kind of white noise in the background even with the earplugs in place. This really helps to keep out any distracting sounds. Sudden noises especially can break my concentration. I stay completely still once I’ve picked my position. I’m trying to trick my body into believing I’m asleep. I Don’t even clear my throat or scratch an itch. It can be really hard at first. Seems like as soon as you get into the zone you end up with what feels like a hair tickling the end of your nose. This always happens to me. It’s sooooo annoying. I just try to push past. I say an affirmation I got from Robert Monroe. You can find this on the Monroe Institute website. You don’t have to use this one but I pretty much have it memorized at this point as I used it frequently in the past years. I shoot a column of light out as far as I can imagine into outer space. Then I clear the space of negative energy. You can do this any way you want for example imagining a vacuum sucking all the negative energy out or whatever floats your boat. From there i focus on putting a large white bubble around myself. I slowly grow the bubble larger and larger until sometimes it surrounds the whole house. Sometimes I will imagine a white cross over my entire body. After I feel safe that the surroundings are purified, I work on my chakras. Imagining each from root to crown. I rotate each clockwise then counterclockwise and imagine energy pulsating and filling them. There is a ton of info out there on chakras if you are unfamiliar with them. After the chakras I work on circulating the energy up through my feet to the crown of my head and then let it pour out my crown chakra like a waterfall down to my feet again. This is a circular cycle I repeat over and over till I feel that i’m done. Then I work on expanding and contracting my aura around me. After all of this i try to just focus on my breath. If my thoughts intrude as soon as I realize this i refocus on my breath again. Today once I reached the zone of full relaxation I started to see swirling white light behind my closed eyelids. Nothing else major happened today but it was a good start after not having mediated after quite some time.
11/27/19 2:30am Well last night i had what i think was a dream about astral projection. I was trying to meditate in bed after going to the bathroom in the middle of the night. I think I fell asleep instead. I became aware of being in bed with my legs separating from my body. They were waving back and forth. I called out for assistance to exit the remainder of the way as I seemed to be stuck. Something grabbed my legs and started yanking. I forcefully threw myself out of my body at this point. It was more like almost stretching and pulling. As soon as i was out I moved as far away from my body as possible. I went down the hall to the front door of the apartment. Then I repeated to myself focus focus focus over and over to get better clarification. I was able to become more alert. I figured that I better make my projection short or i would forget that i had projected. I headed back to my body walking down the hall to my bedroom. I looked in at my body lying in bed and then I was back in my body.
Hiking with family at Wissahickon Valley Park 8/30/20
So, today I attempted to try something new for my meditation technique. Lately I have been humming the mantra sounds for each chakra out loud- Lam, Vam, Ram, Yam, Ham, Om and then silence for the 7th chakra or I repeat the mantra Om again. Today I tried just silently repeating each mantra while deep breathing in and out. I eventually reached the alpha state. It felt as though I was floating in the middle over nowhere intermittently. As soon as I would get excited and realized I had reached this state, I would lose the feeling of nothingness. A calm feeling also came over me and I was able to suddenly recognize that I was holding tension in various areas of my body. As I breathed in with each chakra, I visualized the universal life force entering my root chakra. As I exhaled, I visualized my energy around me expanding and the darkness emptying from each chakra. Once I completed working on each chakra, I just focused on my breath and energy entering my root and crown chakra on and off. At one point, I had a very clear image of a bubble of golden liquid that was rising upwards in my mind. I was actively meditating for almost an hour altogether. This was right after I woke up around 5:53am.
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